(Dr. Mario) Time-a for your physical! Step on the scale, please (Luigi) MAMA MIA!! Epic Game Theory Theme!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hello Internet. Welcome to GAME THEORY! Where you know what I’ve got myself a to-do list. Over the last seven years of this show there have been a lot of lingering mysteries. The story of FNAF, will I ever do Mass Effect part two? When will Diet Coke finally sponsor me? And last episode? I finally put one of those to rest and it felt so good, real good to get that monkey off my back. I say monkey, but really it was a haunted bear robot possessed by a conglomeration of kids souls. Anyway, even though it’s the tail end of summer. Let’s continue our spring cleaning and check another long-running mystery off this list the height of everyone’s favorite, murderous sociopath Mario Jumpman Mario. Now, you loyal theorists will know that over the history of game theory. It has been one of my biggest headaches. Let’s just say it was my version of your princess is in another castle. Each time I thought I had figured out the perfect methodology to confirm Mario’s height Something else would pop up to contradict me until you know, I just eventually gave up. That’s right, I don’t give up too much on this channel. But in this case, I realized I was beaten screwed in the towel, simply going with the 5 foot 1 inch 155 centimeter cannon height claimed by Nintendo. I just needed a height for all the physics episodes and figured who is I to oppose the direct word of Mr. Miyamoto. Now that I think about it opposing official statements by Nintendo is basically the premise of like a quarter of this channel. Long story short, no games in the Mario franchise has ever proven it. No piece of evidence and all my research has ever allowed me to confirm it. Nothing. Blank slate. Nothing, at least until today. That’s right loyal theorists, It’s time to get another monkey off my back and this time it’s an overweight red plummer monkey, because seven years later, we finally have the clue that we need to not just establish. Mario’s canon height, but also the canon heights of literally every other character in the Mushroom Kingdom. Something that as I understand, has never truly been done before, so get ready to update those fan wikis, because it’s my goal to give you the definitive answer that no one knew that they needed, the scientifically proven heights and weights of the key Mario characters and in the process we’re gonna uncover ourselves a threat to the Mushroom Kingdom that is far larger and far more threatening than another dumb Bowser kidnapping plot. Earlier this year, Nintendo released a free update to Super Mario Odyssey called Luigi’s Balloon World. Now show hands who hasn’t heard of this thing? Of course you haven’t!!!!! It came out in February for a game that everyone had picked a shreds by the end of last October, and for all the rest of you who have heard of it. Well, you must-watch Dunkey. Good stuff that Dunkey. Anyway in this little mini game players are able to hide balloons throughout the various kingdoms in the game, other players then try to find them within a certain time limit. It’s almost like Nintendo got tired of placing moons, so they outsource it to the community. I know what you’re up to Nintendo. First, you had us constructing your levels with Mario Maker, Now you’re having us place moons for you too? Oh, we can’t make games that are gonna satisfy the entire fan base. Let them make it for themselves!!! Actually, you know what? That’s a pretty damn brilliant idea. Well done!!!! Nintendo. Well done!!!!! Anyway, besides giving the world an image of Luigi wearing a bowtie while searching for moons, the game provides the current distance between you and the balloon! Nothing too special there until you notice the distance is written in meters, real world ‘M’, meters. And how can we be sure about this? Well by using this in-game ruler as a reference, it’s possible to use pixel measurements to determine that Mario’s height is in fact 5 feet 1 inch or 1 meter and 55 centimeters. Not only is this a confirmation of Mario’s canon height that we’ve been using for the past two years, but it was determined through a mainline Mario game. This isn’t us factoring in the weird scaling of Super Smash Brothers Brawl or that time I used Mario’s cameo in NBA Street. This is an actual Mario platformer, which in all of my research is the first time that Nintendo has gone out of their way to do something that could possibly confirm a statistic like this. It would have been so easy for them to make up a fake unit and call it a day. But no! Not only was the distance written with a real-life unit, but the scale lines up perfectly with Mario’s Nintendo certified canon heights. This, ladies gentleman was intentional. Someone or some group within Nintendo wanted us to find this out and give us the confirmation we’ve been asking for years, and you know what makes that even more interesting? A few years ago on this channel to cover how Rosalina, first introduced in Super Mario Galaxy, is probably Princess Peach’s daughter. I use genetics, physics or to this day. It’s the theory I list as one of my all-time favorites I’ve ever done on this channel. I love it so much these many years later that I even included a mention of it in the theorist journal. Part of the new merch collection that I launched last week , on sale now. Act fast because supplies are limited. Woo! There’s a hidden mystery inside of the merch, click the link in the description or at the end of video, to grab your theorists gear before it’s gone. Look smart. Be smart. Theory wear. Now all chilling aside. What started me down the rabbit hole of that theory to begin with was a story book hidden in Super Mario Galaxy, that seemed to heavily suggest that Rosalina was more than what she seemed. It is, to this day the single largest place of Mario in-game lore, a bit of lore that was never meant to actually be in the game in the first place. The game’s director wrote it late at night when no one was around. So no one would know what was in it. Then he pitched it specifically to Mr. Miyamoto to try and get it squeezed into game. That man was Yoshiaki Kazumi, director of Mario Galaxy and wouldn’t you know it? Lead producer of Super Mario Odyssey. In short, it looks like us theorists may have an Inside Man at Nintendo. Someone who’s starting to seed out stuff for us to latch on to when it comes to the lore of the Mario universe. Seeing by that I’ll be paying close attention to what Koizumi brings us in the future. Anyway, armed with the information from Luigi’s Balloon World, we can now use pixel measurements of all the character models to compare the to the ruler that is Mario Jumpman Mario. We start by getting official ripped models from the game, many of which can be found on The Models Resource. Now, if you’ve never been there and are in any way interested in learning about game artwork, 3D modeling, sprite work textures, whatever the VG resource is an incredible community. From there, We drop those 3d models into a program named Blender. It’s free, open-source 3D computer graphics software, used for everything from animating films and visual effects. And of course, creating video games. Mario Kart Wii believe it or not was the best game to get all these characters into the same place, so we can compare like with like. Though I will say that I did double-check that those measurements were similar across other games as well including Mario Galaxy, Mario Party and Mario Sports Mix. So now that you know how it was all done, let’s go through the results. Luigi, Wario and Yoshi all measured up at 5 foot 9 inches tall. 175 centimeters. Peach and Daisy towered above the boys at 6 foot tall, 183 centimeters, as long as you don’t count their crowns. Rosalina is even bigger at 7 foot 3 inches or 221 centimeters. But surprising nobody, Waluigi is the tallest. Standing at the absolute ridiculous height of 7 foot 7 inches or 231 centimeters. So maybe that’s why Waluigi can’t be included in Smash. We heard that Ridley was too big for years. But let’s face it. Wauigi is just enormous. At that height, he’s bigger than Yao Ming, one of the tallest NBA players ever, who stood at 7 foot 6 inches. And yet for as big as Waluigi is, he’s still nowhere close to the tallest human in recorded history, Robert Wadlow, the giant of Illinois, who stood at the incredible height of 8 foot 11 inches, or 272 centimeters. That’s like a refrigerator and a half. Oh, and in this list, you might be noticing one BIG omission. Both literally and figuratively, Bowser. Yeah, I didn’t include him simply because he changes heights a lot. I mean, a lot, A LOT! This guy changes heights more frequently than I change the order of my FNAF timelines. Anyway, I thought about ending this episode here. We’ve had a lot of long episodes lately. I have a new child to worry about. The in-laws are currently visiting and I should probably spend some time with them, but you know what? I’m not gonna leave you hanging. I mean seriously, this would be a pretty lame episode. Just giving you the heights of a handful of Mushroom Kingdom characters. Where’s the big twist? Where’s the big reveal the surprise conclusion? That’s so what moment that I’d like to end all these episodes on. So I’m deciding to linger in the closet a bit longer, which I swear has nothing to do with me, trying to avoid talking to the in-laws about the Italian Deli(very) down the street for like the umpteenth time, just because it’s an Italian deli doesn’t make it the best deli ever. I’m sorry. So anyway, I’m hanging out in the closet a bit longer to find everyone’s weights too. And that yielded something that was much more surprising. First, let’s talk about methodology. Now, obviously unlike frame rates or pixel measurements, there’s no way to slow down a videogame and perfectly determine the mass of a character. However, back in my “Blue Shell” episode, I mentioned that in Mario Kart 8 Deluxe that each character was assigned an invisible number that correspond to their weight. Mario is listed with the weight of 6 and is known to have a mass of about 90 kilograms or about 198 pounds. Therefore, each weight unit in the game was equal to 15 kilograms or 33 pounds. This also checked out with the weight Ausitn calculated in his SCIENCE video using a very different methodology of water propulsion from Super Mario Sunshine. So overall while it may not be 100% correct, you gotta appreciate that It’s pretty darn close for the weight of a bunch of fictional characters who only just now got associated with a real-world metric for the first time in nearly 40 years!!!! And yes. Before I start commenting, (Internet’s questation)” But Matpat, these ratings are incorrect! Baby Peach and Baby Rosalina are listed with a weight value of 0! Clearly they have mass, this should not be possible!!! Unsubscribe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Yeah, I heard you in the aftermath of the previous video and I recognize that a few of the racers are given a mass of zero in the game’s weight units. But did you stop to consider this! Each racer’s mass is going to be rounded to the nearest whole number. So conceivably, a racer weighing in under half of 33 pounds or 16 and a half pounds or 7.49 kilograms. Those racers would be rounded down and rated as a zero. And having a newborn weigh less than 16 pounds. Take it from Daddy Pat over here. That is perfectly normal. In fact, you want to weigh in under 16 pounds? Otherwise, they’re gonna have a hard time squeezing through the things they have to squeeze through to. Birth is weird. Anyway, is this methodology super precise? NO! But until we’re able to strap all the characters with water jet packs surrounding like this is what we’re gonna have to work with. So using this Mario Kart chart, I was able to come up with a rough mass for everyone. We just covered how Mario weighs in at 198 pounds and his brother Luigi is the same. Sure, he’s thinner but he’s also taller, meaning that he’s also weighing in at around 198 pounds, you know how you’re never supposed to ask a girl for her age or her weight? But why ask when you can stalk her online and use hidden measurements kept on obscure websites. Peach is clocking in at 132 pounds or 60 kilograms. Rosalina, may or may not be Peach’s daughter, but she certainly didn’t inherit her mother’s petite physique, considering that our star princess here tips the scales at 231 pounds or 105 kilograms. Waluigi is a bit heavier at 264 pounds, 120 kilos, and rounding out the top, literally and figuratively to nobody’s surprise is Wario at 330 pounds, 155 kilograms. Now, here’s where that information goes from mildly interesting to alarming. You see, I was curious. So I decided to do one last calculation. Each character’s body mass Index or BMI? All you have to do is to calculate it is take the person’s mass in kilograms and divide it by the person’s height in meters square. Now, why I want to do this? Well, according to the Center for for Disease Control, BMI scores are indicators of your levels of fitness, so I wanted to determine who was roughly the fittest in the Mushroom Kingdom. Heck if the metric is good enough for Wii Fit, It’s good enough for me. So a BMI score of less than 18.5 is considered underweight. 18.5 to 25 is considered normal. BMI of 25 to 30 is considered overweight, 30 to 40 is considered obese, and above 40 is morbidly obese, and it’s here that I discovered what is perhaps the Mushroom Kingdom’s biggest threat? No, it’s not an anthropomorphic turtle dragon with magical abilities, trying to take over a kingdom. It’s not even the oblivious princess wielding an army of mindless fungus service to maintain her rule. No!!! The biggest threat to everyone in the Mushroom Kingdom is their eating habits at their current weight. According to their BMI ratings, every character is in an unhealthy range. Daisy and Peach, underweight. Luigi, over winked. Mario is obese. And Wario is morbidly obese. No one has a healthy body type. Well, no one except for one. Waluigi. (WAHA!!!) You heard that right? Everyone’s favorite purple string being here is in the healthy range, with a BMI of 22.1, he may have been rejected by the Smash Brothers roster, but he wasn’t rejected by the Center for Disease Control. And that ladies and gentlemen is Waluigi’s big secret and the mushroom kingdoms biggest dilemma. Because, let’s face it. If Waluigi’s body shape is what defines healthy in your universe,
great Italian deli meats Don’t get me wrong Italian deli meat is delicious, but its not a be all end all people. There are plenty of good restaurants around just saying ah, all right. I’m going. You know, I can’t leave Stephanie down there alone. Alright, I’ll see you guys next week.