Hey man. I’ve recently been doing some contemplation About people’s dependency upon cellular telephones. Yeah man. Me too. I’ve really noticed that everyone always seems to be on their mobile device instead of really being in the moment. Exactly. And I feel that this is a very significant issue That needs to be address immediately. Yes, immediately. We really should do something about this. Here we have a man Who’s chosen to Instagram His apple pie, a la mode. While he fumbles through the filters His ice cream has gotten “a la hot” And the pie “a la cold.” As you can see This street performer’s drawn a crowd To watch him do his thing. But instead of just enjoying the show it seems that everyone’s decided To make a documentary. Notice this unreasonably attractive couple Enjoying a reasonably priced Italian dinner together. Social networking instead of working On getting to know each other better How does that filtered picture taste Since your dessert has gone to waste? When do you think you ever will Wanna watch this portrait juggling film? You know you want to touch each other Does that feel good? He’s my brother. Get off the phone now! It’s gonna be okay There’s no need to be afraid. It doesn’t love you Its gonna die one day. The government is probably Spying on you with it anyway. Here we have a stereotypical teen Forced to endure “Family Game Night.” He’s stereotypically texting And missing his mom Demonstrate a carousel ride. Little Ethan here Is celebrating being the center of the universe For one year. But “The World’s Greatest Dad” Is more worried about ‘Facebooking’ it Than actually being here. Let’s listen in and see if we can get some context. “Please hurry! We’re at 382 Pine.” He has the nerve to make a phone call At such a pivotal moment in his friend’s life. How could you be so disengaged? While precious memories are being made? Do you really think your friends need Another baby picture in their feed? Don’t be such a self- centered guy. Now isn’t that better? “I think he just died.” Get off the phone now! It’s gonna be okay. There’s no need to be afraid. (Get off the phone now!)
It doesn’t love you It’s gonna die one day. It’s crawling with e-coli bacteria anyway. (Get off the phone now!)
It’s gonna be okay. Hey guys. I’m on the set of our music video. There’s Rhett. Seriously? What?